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Ella, inspiring us, again! God bless you, dearhearts! I don't know what to tell you. But if I and some people I know have found ways to heal, y'all can do it! Well, I hope so. I have been through some, uhm, interesting things in my life. I wouldn't even share them with y'all. Pardon me for this, as I am a little reserved when it comes to certain things. And stories I have heard from some of the strongest and most hopeful people I know, would turn this thread into a rated R thread. All I can say is that when it comes down to it, it's about you sitting down with your heart, mind, memories- face to face- and saying: "Look here, this is my life and I make the decisions about how we are going to deal with this and where we are going from here."
There are many ways of doing this- healing, plowing through it, journaling, therapy, etc. And it can take minutes or years. To get to the point where I am, feeling pretty good actually, it was because I always made the choice, a Choice- consciously!- to aim for some better feeling. That doesn't mean that I didn't have my bouts of depression where I decided to stay in bed a few days, i must confess. But even then, I decided that it was time well-spent resting my mind and body and I just let my body limp and heal.
As an aside, I will admit too, that I had a long-term partner (who helped to contribute to my, uhm, tough growing pains-in other words, erm, do take care and thoughtful consideration with regards to therapeutic cuddling/dating/ friendships. Vulnerability can be valuable, but desperation/neediness/weakness can open up a whole different kind of can or lead to outright toxicity. That said, I do love good hugs!) Oops, I digress, through much of this time, with a long-term partner, blahdah-blahdah (me, who had a anxiety attack many years ago when a very nice boy asked me out and was gently coached out of it, by my mother). Ha! Oh, well!
I wish I could give you all a big hug and a high five. Now, this is one of the questions that has helped me a lot: How is that working for ya?
I have used this question with myself and with others! If you can give yourself pause sometimes, you can create a new circuitry and that can change- Every Thing! Even just a little moving to the side can create miracles! I reminded myself more than several times, "Has any of this "I can't yada yada ever caused a positive thing to happen?... What did all this blah blah ever get me?"
In the past, I also was often very negative because there was some part of me that confused attention or pity with caring or love or some other feeling or goal I had. But pitying myself or people pitying me was not actually satisfying and didn't necessarily lead to some change in my world that made my life better. After all those years I spent learning ( or some might say wasted, if they don't care to look at the bright side which is the side that makes a big difference), it turned out and still turns out that I had to be the one that made the decision and that cared best myself, had empathy for myself, and even pampered myself because I am with me all the time. I am in my head and my heart is with me- 24 hours a day! Yah, I have wonderful friends and family- I have my whole life, but it is me and me, all the time- in those dark nights of the soul, in the times of spiritual and existential crisis, in this times when I wonder if life is a hologram or if I am just the marionette of some evil or uncaring puppet master! Hehehe. Sometimes I cry as I wonder about the nature or reality. I hear a news snippet and wonder why I am condemned to participate in humanity. BUT! I let it come. I and I (me and me, or angels, or aliens, or friends, Youtube, etc) have a sit down and we find ways. We reach into the Universe that we are seemingly a part of. We call out to the Cosmos, to Kwan Yin, to Jesus, to ArchAngels, to Benevolent ETs, to EFT, we have exchange Reiki with friends, we YouTube, we watch Drs. Wayne Dyer and Bruce Lipton, we cry, we sigh, we eat chocolate and bacon, we massage our feet, we pray, we meditate, we lead ourselves through a guided lovely ethereal daydream out loud! We decide to climb that mountain, we decide to look and reach for that better feeling! We even play act! We recite beautiful, dramatic, sad, and poetic scenes for the audience of ourselves and the unseen... and we are stronger! I am stronger and I am alive! And I am glad that I am experiencing being alive and now I am curious to see how good this is gonna keep getting!
Hahahaha! Whoooo! After writing that, like a woman possessed, I feel a little euphoric! It's like I just landed a perfect jump off the swings. Heck ya, I still go jump off the swings, once in a while And hug trees. I send them love and thank them for oxygen and they send back their own solid kinda love! Even the strongest trees bend and sway in the wind! Those synapses- your mental tree branches, much! I used to think that I was possibly cursed from past lives, if that sort of thing exists, but guess what, even past 35, my brain, my synapses are still growing, stretching, and changing! My friend is 77! She has taught me so much, and she thought she was "ingrained" whathaveyou, until after she was 40 and that tree is still growing! She still surprises me when she heals anew from a thing or changes a 70 year old belief! We had a laugh like silly teenagers, just last month.
Ah! Pardon me! Bref, it was definitely with some stumbles backwards, but always pawing, crawling, leaping forward. I am the only one that can choose and then go with my "now!" There were times I had it handed to me and I just kinda accidentally left it somewhere or violently hurled it from the mountain of frustration, pain, anger, etc. Meh, you know. I don't know when/where your "now" is, but I hope it is in the best, greatest, and highest perfect time/event for you and all that you are involved with.
PS: I do wish for y'all the delicious splendor of a quiet mind. It's not that I try to get mine to shut up, anymore. More like, I take the rotten eggs out and start putting in juicy fruits. Now, it might empties itself on occasion, but when it doesn't and I am ready for something different after kicking around the mental punching bag, I say why shut try to shut up the mind?! The trying is what? What are you doing when you are trying. So, sometimes, I pour mine a glass of wine, let it out for a walk, read it a book, give it a nap, sing it a song, or just let it impress me with good ideas for it's roundhouse kicks.
PS: How did all this writing happen? Hahaha! DIVINE- EMBRACE. ICE-BLUE.

(18-05-2016, 08:43 AM)charr Wrote: [ -> ]Ella, inspiring us, again! God bless you, dearhearts! I don't know what to tell you. But if I and some people I know have found ways to heal, y'all can do it! Well, I hope so. I have been through some, uhm, interesting things in my life. I wouldn't even share them with y'all. Pardon me for this, as I am a little reserved when it comes to certain things. And stories I have heard from some of the strongest and most hopeful people I know, would turn this thread into a rated R thread. All I can say is that when it comes down to it, it's about you sitting down with your heart, mind, memories- face to face- and saying: "Look here, this is my life and I make the decisions about how we are going to deal with this and where we are going from here."
There are many ways of doing this- healing, plowing through it, journaling, therapy, etc. And it can take minutes or years. To get to the point where I am, feeling pretty good actually, it was because I always made the choice, a Choice- consciously!- to aim for some better feeling. That doesn't mean that I didn't have my bouts of depression where I decided to stay in bed a few days, i must confess. But even then, I decided that it was time well-spent resting my mind and body and I just let my body limp and heal.
As an aside, I will admit too, that I had a long-term partner (who helped to contribute to my, uhm, tough growing pains-in other words, erm, do take care and thoughtful consideration with regards to therapeutic cuddling/dating/ friendships. Vulnerability can be valuable, but desperation/neediness/weakness can open up a whole different kind of can or lead to outright toxicity. That said, I do love good hugs!) Oops, I digress, through much of this time, with a long-term partner, blahdah-blahdah (me, who had a anxiety attack many years ago when a very nice boy asked me out and was gently coached out of it, by my mother). Ha! Oh, well!
I wish I could give you all a big hug and a high five. Now, this is one of the questions that has helped me a lot: How is that working for ya?
I have used this question with myself and with others! If you can give yourself pause sometimes, you can create a new circuitry and that can change- Every Thing! Even just a little moving to the side can create miracles! I reminded myself more than several times, "Has any of this "I can't yada yada ever caused a positive thing to happen?... What did all this blah blah ever get me?"
In the past, I also was often very negative because there was some part of me that confused attention or pity with caring or love or some other feeling or goal I had. But pitying myself or people pitying me was not actually satisfying and didn't necessarily lead to some change in my world that made my life better. After all those years I spent learning ( or some might say wasted, if they don't care to look at the bright side which is the side that makes a big difference), it turned out and still turns out that I had to be the one that made the decision and that cared best myself, had empathy for myself, and even pampered myself because I am with me all the time. I am in my head and my heart is with me- 24 hours a day! Yah, I have wonderful friends and family- I have my whole life, but it is me and me, all the time- in those dark nights of the soul, in the times of spiritual and existential crisis, in this times when I wonder if life is a hologram or if I am just the marionette of some evil or uncaring puppet master! Hehehe. Sometimes I cry as I wonder about the nature or reality. I hear a news snippet and wonder why I am condemned to participate in humanity. BUT! I let it come. I and I (me and me, or angels, or aliens, or friends, Youtube, etc) have a sit down and we find ways. We reach into the Universe that we are seemingly a part of. We call out to the Cosmos, to Kwan Yin, to Jesus, to ArchAngels, to Benevolent ETs, to EFT, we have exchange Reiki with friends, we YouTube, we watch Drs. Wayne Dyer and Bruce Lipton, we cry, we sigh, we eat chocolate and bacon, we massage our feet, we pray, we meditate, we lead ourselves through a guided lovely ethereal daydream out loud! We decide to climb that mountain, we decide to look and reach for that better feeling! We even play act! We recite beautiful, dramatic, sad, and poetic scenes for the audience of ourselves and the unseen... and we are stronger! I am stronger and I am alive! And I am glad that I am experiencing being alive and now I am curious to see how good this is gonna keep getting!
Hahahaha! Whoooo! After writing that, like a woman possessed, I feel a little euphoric! It's like I just landed a perfect jump off the swings. Heck ya, I still go jump off the swings, once in a while And hug trees. I send them love and thank them for oxygen and they send back their own solid kinda love! Even the strongest trees bend and sway in the wind! Those synapses- your mental tree branches, much! I used to think that I was possibly cursed from past lives, if that sort of thing exists, but guess what, even past 35, my brain, my synapses are still growing, stretching, and changing! My friend is 77! She has taught me so much, and she thought she was "ingrained" whathaveyou, until after she was 40 and that tree is still growing! She still surprises me when she heals anew from a thing or changes a 70 year old belief! We had a laugh like silly teenagers, just last month.
Ah! Pardon me! Bref, it was definitely with some stumbles backwards, but always pawing, crawling, leaping forward. I am the only one that can choose and then go with my "now!" There were times I had it handed to me and I just kinda accidentally left it somewhere or violently hurled it from the mountain of frustration, pain, anger, etc. Meh, you know. I don't know when/where your "now" is, but I hope it is in the best, greatest, and highest perfect time/event for you and all that you are involved with.
PS: I do wish for y'all the delicious splendor of a quiet mind. It's not that I try to get mine to shut up, anymore. More like, I take the rotten eggs out and start putting in juicy fruits. Now, it might empties itself on occasion, but when it doesn't and I am ready for something different after kicking around the mental punching bag, I say why shut try to shut up the mind?! The trying is what? What are you doing when you are trying. So, sometimes, I pour mine a glass of wine, let it out for a walk, read it a book, give it a nap, sing it a song, or just let it impress me with good ideas for it's roundhouse kicks.
PS: How did all this writing happen? Hahaha! DIVINE- EMBRACE. ICE-BLUE.

I love hearing from you char I really do. Not alot more I can say. You are a treasure xxx

(18-05-2016, 04:41 PM)blessedbreasts Wrote: [ -> ]Serious question. How on Earth have you girls managed to get into romantic relationships? I swear my issues have kept me from getting anywhere near one. I feel like everyone got a key that I never received that unlocks a door in a location I don't know about. Or, more realistically, I'm just really ugly and disgusting.

So I've been doing research on seeds, since I want to add them to my trail mix. I want to get sunflower seeds, but I thought sesame seeds might be good, too. Here's a comparison of the two: http://skipthepie.org/nut-and-seed-produ...ole-dried/ It looks like sunflower seeds do better where vitamins are concerned, but sesame seeds have higher mineral counts. Sort of split where amino acids are concerned. Honestly, they both look good.

Oh, and during my research, I found something amazing! Here this woman talks about consuming different seeds at different times of the month to help balance your hormones: http://www.creativesimplelife.com/balanc...d-cycling/ Wow!!! This is so cool and innovative! Maybe I should try this, using different seeds during different times of the month in my trail mix.

I read that too, but they asked for money to explain how the rotation worked. but yes rotating seeds and balancing hormones. Il look at those links too. Not sure i want to keep taking maca.

And relationships, well i attracted alot of bag eggs believe me. I still do. I have my beautiful amazing husband and i self sabotaged the relationship alot because i didnt feel i deserved him. But Im working on that. I had a bad friend in my life right now who knows my weaknesses and plays on them trust me but im working on getting that person out of my life or at least trying to manage the situation.

You will find a good man you really will. I probably only met my prince at your age now! Took a long time.

Youtube has some anti-sweating subliminals that could be worth a try.

I've heard that www.photofeeler.com can be useful for determining your attractiveness. OKCupid is my favorite dating site because they have you answer so many questions that you can screen people out really easily without ever having to interact with them.

"I love hearing from you char I really do. Not alot more I can say. You are a treasure xxx"


Thank you! I am humbled, really. It's not me! Heee! It's too big and too good for it to originate with me! Something in this Universe cares about me and I care about me, too. It's been a major team effort. The unseen can be a really great coach! My friends, family, spirituality, and honestly, the Internet! Even y'all. I can't tell you how online support has inspired me and helped me with so many areas of life!
And GRATITUDE!
I am feeling so blessed to be here, using this computer, talking to people across the world, almost for free! I am never alone. If I had all this and didn't recognize or appreciate it, my life story would be different- unfortunately so, I am sure.
I am so grateful for so much! I am just thankful for every little thing I can acknowledge that blesses me! Indoor plumbling, clouds in the sky, Breast Nexus members!

I have definitely heard about seeds have hormonal effects: Fennel, fenugreek, sesame seeds. I try to eat sesame seeds often. I just sprinkle them on my food, but I don't think I had heard of rotating them, though I have heard of the rotation diet where people try to rotate foods based on the season or temperature- maybe- to correlate with natural cycles. Like warming foods during winter and lighter foods in the summer.

PS: Really? Ugly? Disgusting? Does this kind of thinking or talking do something for you? Even when I was not confident about myself, I just couldn't write something like that about myself. Ugh! And right here?! Online, you are saying that about our friend!? Pshaw! Girl, you better not badmouth our girl, blessed breasts! I am about to go exorcist on ya! Devils and demons, leave right now and stay out forever! Angels, love, and light surround you! Amen! Aho! and Ashay! Some "ugly" people are the most beautiful people.
PPS: About the "romantic" relationship thing, Blessed Breasts, embodiment of love, tell me this: what is romantic to and for you?... ... ... [elevator music] Now, tell me if you exude that from your being. I don't mean that you are on a pulpit showing off or that you have it tattooed on your forehead. I mean do you exude the deliciousness of the girl that you want your ideal guy to love and cherish?
I am not saying that I and a lot of people I know are "psychic" enough to guess the lottery numbers and such. What I am saying is that, especially when people are more open and confident and caring about themselves and what is a part of their world, they may have more acute perception. I know that a lot of people can sort of sense, smell, etc, what kind of person a person is by unknown cues. Think about the people that you are drawn to in a positive way. We all have errors in judgement because we also learn.
Also, faith, hope, confidence all help.
Well, I have tried to be kind, considerate, empathetic, compassionate towards people in my life. It really works best when it starts, here [points at my heart]. I try to treat me as well (and better, you know it, girls!) as I treat others and because I am glad for others to treat me well! I was shy, shy, shy! Sometimes even I was surprised someone might like me, but even if someone show(ed)(s) me attention- for work, friendship, romance, family- I let them know that this is a valuable, fun, respectable, confident, worthwhile person they are getting to the opportunity interacting with! And you know who people like interacting with, very often? People like valuable, fun, respectable, confident, worthwhile people! That's me! Some people would say that flowers, dating, sex (which can be so base, at times) = equals romance! Ridiculous! In my opinion, sorry my frankness, none of those are obvious signs of romance for me. I am not arrogant, "high maintenance," or stuck up, but romance is much more for me than physical or hormones or "chemistry." Actually I am still a bit shy and careful about how I live, but I am more myself. Hehehe. Sometimes I embarrass myself because I am more "me," but life is better, now. I just accept for my life, as much as Source blesses me, to be the most wonderful life! I am worthy! Treat yourself well, be your own friend, respect yourself, romance yourself more and see what happens.

(19-05-2016, 03:57 AM)Candace Wrote: [ -> ]Youtube has some anti-sweating subliminals that could be worth a try.

I've heard that www.photofeeler.com can be useful for determining your attractiveness. OKCupid is my favorite dating site because they have you answer so many questions that you can screen people out really easily without ever having to interact with them.

Thank you so much, Candace. I've ordered this: http://www.amazon.com/Certain-Dri-Anti-Perspirant-1-2oz/dp/B000052X8R/ref=sr_1_1_s_it?s=beauty&ie=UTF8&qid=1463663569&sr=1-1&keywords=certain+dri People have had permanent results with it. I really hope it works for me. I sweat profusely even when I'm cold!

Yikes, anything that determines attractiveness is a no-go for me. I just know it will find me ugly. I feel bad enough already. And I avoid dating sites because I'm a black female and we're the least desired for online dating. Plus most black women have nothing but horror stories when it comes to online dating. It would all just be an even bigger blow to my already non-existent self-confidence.