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Oh gosh having the Boyfriend anxious and offering to buy more would make me feel so much MORE insecure about my size    


My husband found out and only cause I'm terrible at hiding things... he laughed it off and the sad thing is I did really well at one point and was in a 32D but he's an "ass" man so never really noticed the change although from memory he was poking my cleavage a lot.... then I got my gut infection and my autoimmune stuff so lost a tonne og weight and the boobs  

For now I don't like to wear the push up bras I used to wear in the past as they see how much they squash up breast tissue to I feel even smaller but I'm trying to regain the weight and boobs!

That's exactly how I felt, Ella! Like at first he laughed it off and was like "Why are you doing this? This is crazy! I don't want you to feel like you have to do this for me." which made me feel silly and stupid, but then later he said "Well if this is something you want then I'll pay for it." And initially I was happy that he was supportive, but then I could see how anxious he was as the months went by to see my breasts growing (especially since he was funding my project, lol) and that really took a hit on my self-esteem, especially when I had ZERO results from those things. I was such a noob and didn't know the first thing about NBE, so no wonder I didn't grow any.  

But yeah, it's crazy how either way I was bound to end up feeling bad. Like when he laughed it off and made it seem like he didn't want me to do it, I felt so stupid and ashamed and embarrassed. But then when he became supremely supportive, it made me feel insecure about my body as it was. It was really a lose lose for me, which is another reason why I'll just keep this NBE hobby to myself for the time being!!!

Oh, and I'm the worst at hiding things too!! It helps though that me and my partner don't snoop through each others stuff, and also she's not prying at all. I think if I was in a relationship with anyone else, they would have found out by now, lol.

Xoxo