[blessedbreasts]

I thought I was getting better, but I can't shake it when I'm out in public. I feel ashamed to have people look at me.

You really need to overcome your shyness and approach that (potential) boyfriend. Once you have established a relationship with a boyfriend I am sure that he will assure you that you are very desirable. He will be proud to be seen in public with you. Next time you see him be sure to establish eye contact and I strongly recommend that you go and talk to him, even if he is with other people. I fear that since you have seen him at least twice since moving, but not followed up with contact that he will take that as a message that you are not interested. He has already made it clear that he is interested in you,  but if you continue to ignore him, he will give up on you.

You're right. I have a tendency to do this. Ignoring guys is my specialty. I love screwing things up for myself when it comes to potential romance.

I actually did this recently... I didn't say anything about this, but one day a few weeks ago, when I was at work, there was a good-looking guy who noticed me (I think the guys in this city find me more attractive than the guys in my hometown, since I tend to attract a certain race and there's more of them here and the population here is younger). He actually tried to talk to me, which never ever ever ever EVER happens. But I was nervous and felt super awkward and creeped out, so I politely shut him down. Now I wish I'd at least practiced on him, struck up a conversation, asked him questions about himself. Wasted opportunity. But a perfect example of how my mind sabotages things for me.

Sigh...