15-08-2016, 07:28 AM
Okay! I'm sure you're all eager to hear how things went with the boy. Here's a full report:
He wasn't there.
Down to NBE and diet business. I'm going to start putting more pressure on myself to eat enough at meals throughout the day. Today I barely ate because I was so busy and I felt horrible and I was worried I'd faint at one point. It would have been during a super inopportune time, too, where I happened to be around people who were meeting me for the first time. I would have ruined everything.
My problem lately has been that I feel really uncomfortable when I eat because my stomach has shrunk so much. So I don't want to eat enough. Not even because I want a small waist anymore; purely because eating enough makes me feel uncomfortable. So annoying. I mentally can't get past it. I've lost interest even in really yummy food lately as a result.
I'm going to have to fight through it mentally. And maybe it will help if I have more of my favorite foods handy.
This is so embarrassing, but a child made me feel a little bad about my body today. A child. I know how pitiful that is, but I can't help it. Her grandmother gestured to me and said, "You're going to be built like that when you grow up" because the girl is quite slim. Well, the little girl got this disapproving look on her face and said "...no. I want at least a little weight on me." Yikes...
Still no luteal swelling. Praying I'm not in luteal already and this is the best I can do this month. I'm not filling my bras out like I was. I'm going to do my best to do my evening massage routine around 6:00 (I usually do it at 8:00). I feel like that will better ensure I get the routine in.
He wasn't there.
Down to NBE and diet business. I'm going to start putting more pressure on myself to eat enough at meals throughout the day. Today I barely ate because I was so busy and I felt horrible and I was worried I'd faint at one point. It would have been during a super inopportune time, too, where I happened to be around people who were meeting me for the first time. I would have ruined everything.
My problem lately has been that I feel really uncomfortable when I eat because my stomach has shrunk so much. So I don't want to eat enough. Not even because I want a small waist anymore; purely because eating enough makes me feel uncomfortable. So annoying. I mentally can't get past it. I've lost interest even in really yummy food lately as a result.
I'm going to have to fight through it mentally. And maybe it will help if I have more of my favorite foods handy.
This is so embarrassing, but a child made me feel a little bad about my body today. A child. I know how pitiful that is, but I can't help it. Her grandmother gestured to me and said, "You're going to be built like that when you grow up" because the girl is quite slim. Well, the little girl got this disapproving look on her face and said "...no. I want at least a little weight on me." Yikes...
Still no luteal swelling. Praying I'm not in luteal already and this is the best I can do this month. I'm not filling my bras out like I was. I'm going to do my best to do my evening massage routine around 6:00 (I usually do it at 8:00). I feel like that will better ensure I get the routine in.