[caitemh]

Hello ladies. Long time no talk.

It's now been two months since I left my ex, and things are going very well.

II've actually met a new man, and we are hitting it off really well.

Unfortunately he came across my herbs one night in the bathroom. I tried passing them off as herbs for just general female hormone balance. But in an effort to get to know this man (we did a secret sharing night) and I came clean about my program.

He's against it. Wants me to be safe, and he says I don't need it. Well, I did need it last August! What I have now is not brilliant, But it's a big improvement.

I have been inconsistently taking my herbs, but I think I'm going to take a break for a while. I had a very nasty scare, and my period was two weeks late this month, despite the fact that I did not change my program. I even skipped my PM and Pc cream this cycle.

I have not done any noogling in weeks. My time is scarce. But I'm not upset about the way I look now. My obsession with looking more womanly was very circumstantial. And as much as I didn't want to admit it, it was partly my ex that caused me to desire a more curvy and voluptuous figure.

He had a very serious, and damaging pornography addiction. I felt very, very inadequate. So I did want a more appealing body for myself, but also for him.. So he did not need his addiction. But that failed.

My life is not perfect now, but it's getting there. I feel amazing about myself, I'm working out, and I'm happy.

I will still visit you girls, and who knows, I may keep noogling in secret (he doesn't know about my NB! Just the herbs!)

Take care, happy growing.