[Isabelle]

Haha gasolinerainbow,

You've got your work cut out for you. And your wars. Probably get to use some of the tactics you learn in kung-fu

In the big corporate world, we always met denial. We actually had to prove, with supporting data, that there was a glass ceiling, that there were gender biases in job descriptions and in HR systems. And even where we got those facts accepted, it was extremely hard to come up with alternatives that were fair.

It's kinda fun that you write both in your blog and here. You will meet women who learned that inequality can work both ways, and have made it work their way. Whether they have chosen to become like men or to become stereotypes of women, they are harder to convince than men. Too much at stake. But because you have a foothold in both worlds, you have an advantage.

[gasolinerainbow]

I hope I have an advantage it's definitely interesting being in both worlds even if doesn't turn out to be advantageous. At the end of the day, I don't want to tell anyone to act in a certain way whether I prove the 'new' glass ceiling or not. There are always going to be women who are being true to themselves by acting in the way that I'm describing as predominantly 'constructed'. I would hate them to think that I'm trying to stop that.

Also, I've done loads of research into testosterone, oestrogen and oxytocin for my latest blog post... http://ibelieveingenderequality.blogspot.co.uk/2012/06/hormones.html the post isn't relevant to NBE so there's no need to read it, but the point I wanted to make about my research is very relevant.

Everything I discovered by trawling through scientific literature and journals was ambiguous, contradtictory and absolutely unhelpful compared to the very neat and 'selective' research I found through google. This made me wonder about the hormones we discuss in NBE, and how valid the ideas we construct our programs on actually are? I mean if it works, it works, don't stop. But for those it isn't working for, it may not be a bad idea to try out some majorly new routine ideas, instead of everyone following in a similar vein.

As for me, I'm massaging, NipFab-ing and awaiting PM a very full D at the moment. Happy happy happy

[gasolinerainbow]

I went travelling around Europe for a month. Beforehand the doc finally put me on the standard BCP. I feel way better on it than I did on the POP pill,the endless bleeding has stopped for one!

But by the end of the trip my boobs seem to have shrunk to nearly 34B again. They also have little marks on them like bruises or stretch marks. I can't understand why this is losing weight is the obvious possibility but let's just say I was not a starving traveller... And I weigh the same amount.

I also bought a hilarious Bollywood Bra from a theatre shop in Berlin. I showed it to my boyfriend and his first comment was 'isn't it too big for you?' you know, because my boobs are so small and inadequate, and I would obviously spend money on a novelty bra that doesn't fit.

I am so sick of feeling deformed in front of him. I know other people like my boobs I quite like my boobs. Why does the one person whose actually supposed to see them and touch them have to make me feel so horrible about them sometimes I feel like this ugly, mini lady that never grew into a proper woman.

[AbiDrew85]

Dang girl. That boyfriend of yours sounds like a real gem... NOT!

Does he do that sort of destructive criticism on a regular basis? IMO... Try talking to him about how those comments make you feel... If he still keeps it up, he ain't worth it. No guy is worth that.

[gasolinerainbow]

His latest slant is that I'm stupid for getting upset by his comments and it's my fault for having low self-esteem and not being able to come to terms with my body. I should just accept that he finds other womens' breasts more attractive and still feel good about myself.

Well I do feel good about myself. In front of people who actually like my body.

[AbiDrew85]

I'm sorry, but if he doesn't find you attractive just the way you are, and isn't willing to stfu about things that you're insecure about... Then to top it all he starts saying you're stupid to have insecurities? That it's your fault? Ditch his sorry arse. He ain't worth it. Let him go find someone more "attractive".

You can and should find someone who'll treat you better. Sometimes the creeps learn and eventually become decent guys, but it's never from you sticking with them through their abuse, they'll only learn if they're forced to - no one wanting to be with them.

[Babakins]

OMG I totally agree with Dr Abi (love and boob doctor!) ditch him! He sounds like what we call in the UK a right proper nobhead! I wonder how he would feel if you flipped it round and told him that you don't feel 100% about him physically? I'm not so sure he'd be as cocksure then even if he proceeded to hide it well.

*hugs gasoline

[AbiDrew85]

Aww c'mon now... I'm neither a booby nor a love doctor.

I've just known too many girls who think they need to stick with losers like gasoline's bf...

[TibetanPrincess]

The BF again! I think you should grow the boobs large and then dump his @ss.

[NotSoBusty]

I absolutely cannot believe this "boyfriend" of yours!! Girl, you are truly exponentially better of without him. Without his constant source of criticism, you will flourish! There is somebody else out there who is just waiting to show the respect you deserve. Don't waste any more time with someone who makes you feel bad!! He obviously has more issues that need to be dealt with, but that is not your problem or responsibility. Don't let him make you feel like you are any less than you are. You are MORE than a bra size, but his pea-sized, selfish brain cannot comprehend that. You deserve better!