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Is swelling a sign that growth will eventually happen?

#31

(20-07-2020, 16:44)koyasha Wrote:  

I like how active you are on here. Whenever I come back, there is a new post from you :-) 

Vit e oil, I see, thanks. Glad you don't have to take a break from pumping. It must feel like starting all over again after having pumped for a few days and then having to take a break. I know what you mean about the gauge, my Kangzhu has that, as well. I really hope you skin will get used to it, it would be nice if you could at least get to -2 where you saw the swelling. I don't know if there is any other oil you could use to prevent your skin from changing color and from getting these dots. I think slowly increasing the amount of pressure sounds like the best thing you can do at the moment. When I place the cups under my bigger breast (to create an underboob), I get stretch marks easily, maybe I am pumping too hard, as well. I am not the most patient person on this planet, even though I know it's essential for NBE.

Thank you. I'm one of the people who has been on the forum for a long time, but barely posted. I really miss how active it use to be in the old days. I joined in 2014 and tried some herbs (not PM though because I had estrogen dominance symptoms back then but a few of the others) and didn't really respond well and practically stopped NBE after with the intention of going back to it. I had a lot of other stuff going on over the years and had gained weight that I wanted to take off as well. I never intended for six years to pass. I think I finally got to a point where I was tired of hating my breasts but always thinking about having bigger and better breasts in the future whenever I eventually went back to NBE while not being in the process of working on it. I finally got to a point where I decided I was going to go big or go home and put all of my effort into it for a year or two and see what happens. 
Maybe stretch marks are a result of growth? Lol I'm not patient either. I have been at it for only a week and a half and every day I'm examining in the mirror like "are you bigger yet?" lol.
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#32

I wonder why it's not as active anymore. I don't think there are fewer women who want to enhance their breasts naturally. Maybe everything has been discussed already, but I wouldn't mind discussing it all over again if it meant more activity!

Did you experience any side effects from the herbs you were using back then or did they simply not work?

I also stopped NBE at some point and gained weight lol. It was only one year or so for me, but I'm back to square one, as well. How much did you weigh before, now, and what is your goal weight? My highest weight was 169.8 lbs and my lowest was 68.6 lbs (a difference of more than 100 lbs, sounds insane to me). I did or so still have issues with food, though. I'm around 133 lbs now (at 5'1), which is borderline overweight :-( I'd like to lose 34 lbs. I have a small frame, so I look chubby when I am in the higher range of normal according to bmi standards. A former colleague of mine was calling me chubby behind my back after I had gained weight and was in the 103-110 lbs range, so it's not just in my head. Glad he did it behind my back, though, it was easier hearing from someone that 'someone else' had said that about me while the person who told me was being nice about it. It was a touchy subject for me.

I think I read somewhere that you too, had bulimia at some point? How is it going with the eating for you these days? 

"Go big or go home", I'm gonna make this my motto, I'm such a slob when it comes to a lot of things. I haven't been to the gym in 8 months.. I'm sitting here dreaming about losing weight and looking fitter and better in general while.. well, sitting here.

Maybe the stretch marks are a result of growth, but I doubt it, my boob doesn't look any different in shape yet. I know what you mean about examining your breast(s) in the mirror all the time. I wish I could avoid mirrors for a year and then wake up and be like wow :-)

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#33

(21-07-2020, 10:10)koyasha Wrote:  

I wonder why it's not as active anymore. I don't think there are fewer women who want to enhance their breasts naturally. Maybe everything has been discussed already, but I wouldn't mind discussing it all over again if it meant more activity!

Did you experience any side effects from the herbs you were using back then or did they simply not work?

I also stopped NBE at some point and gained weight lol. It was only one year or so for me, but I'm back to square one, as well. How much did you weigh before, now, and what is your goal weight? My highest weight was 169.8 lbs and my lowest was 68.6 lbs (a difference of more than 100 lbs, sounds insane to me). I did or so still have issues with food, though. I'm around 133 lbs now (at 5'1), which is borderline overweight :-( I'd like to lose 34 lbs. I have a small frame, so I look chubby when I am in the higher range of normal according to bmi standards. A former colleague of mine was calling me chubby behind my back after I had gained weight and was in the 103-110 lbs range, so it's not just in my head. Glad he did it behind my back, though, it was easier hearing from someone that 'someone else' had said that about me while the person who told me was being nice about it. It was a touchy subject for me.

I think I read somewhere that you too, had bulimia at some point? How is it going with the eating for you these days? 

"Go big or go home", I'm gonna make this my motto, I'm such a slob when it comes to a lot of things. I haven't been to the gym in 8 months.. I'm sitting here dreaming about losing weight and looking fitter and better in general while.. well, sitting here.

Maybe the stretch marks are a result of growth, but I doubt it, my boob doesn't look any different in shape yet. I know what you mean about examining your breast(s) in the mirror all the time. I wish I could avoid mirrors for a year and then wake up and be like wow :-)

I don't know either but I really miss how active it use to be here. I never went on any herbs that was too heavy like PM or anything. I think Saw Palmetto & Fenugreek and a few of the things like that. I don't remember side effects I just remember them not working, but I also don't think I stayed on them long at all.  I'm shorter as well. Yeah, I did a really long time ago but I have been recovered for several years. It was something that was when I was a teenager and possibly played a part in my breasts not really developing correctly. I'd like to lose 15 lbs. I'm not worried about it impacting NBE since I'm only going to be pumping my smaller breast until they are even (which will likely take longer than it will to lose the weight) and my small breast doesn't respond at all to weight gain or loss anyways. That is horrible about your colleague!!! I wish people weren't like that. I've had my fair share with people like that when I was younger and it was such a touchy subject for me that it would always set me off emotionally. I feel like I look a little chubby at the higher end of the weight range too, and it also makes me nervous about tipping back over into being overweight so I don't really like it.
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#34

(21-07-2020, 14:58)PoisonIvy Wrote:  
(21-07-2020, 10:10)koyasha Wrote:  

I wonder why it's not as active anymore. I don't think there are fewer women who want to enhance their breasts naturally. Maybe everything has been discussed already, but I wouldn't mind discussing it all over again if it meant more activity!

Did you experience any side effects from the herbs you were using back then or did they simply not work?

I also stopped NBE at some point and gained weight lol. It was only one year or so for me, but I'm back to square one, as well. How much did you weigh before, now, and what is your goal weight? My highest weight was 169.8 lbs and my lowest was 68.6 lbs (a difference of more than 100 lbs, sounds insane to me). I did or so still have issues with food, though. I'm around 133 lbs now (at 5'1), which is borderline overweight :-( I'd like to lose 34 lbs. I have a small frame, so I look chubby when I am in the higher range of normal according to bmi standards. A former colleague of mine was calling me chubby behind my back after I had gained weight and was in the 103-110 lbs range, so it's not just in my head. Glad he did it behind my back, though, it was easier hearing from someone that 'someone else' had said that about me while the person who told me was being nice about it. It was a touchy subject for me.

I think I read somewhere that you too, had bulimia at some point? How is it going with the eating for you these days? 

"Go big or go home", I'm gonna make this my motto, I'm such a slob when it comes to a lot of things. I haven't been to the gym in 8 months.. I'm sitting here dreaming about losing weight and looking fitter and better in general while.. well, sitting here.

Maybe the stretch marks are a result of growth, but I doubt it, my boob doesn't look any different in shape yet. I know what you mean about examining your breast(s) in the mirror all the time. I wish I could avoid mirrors for a year and then wake up and be like wow :-)

I don't know either but I really miss how active it use to be here. I never went on any herbs that was too heavy like PM or anything. I think Saw Palmetto & Fenugreek and a few of the things like that. I don't remember side effects I just remember them not working, but I also don't think I stayed on them long at all.  I'm shorter as well. Yeah, I did a really long time ago but I have been recovered for several years. It was something that was when I was a teenager and possibly played a part in my breasts not really developing correctly. I'd like to lose 15 lbs. I'm not worried about it impacting NBE since I'm only going to be pumping my smaller breast until they are even (which will likely take longer than it will to lose the weight) and my small breast doesn't respond at all to weight gain or loss anyways. That is horrible about your colleague!!! I wish people weren't like that. I've had my fair share with people like that when I was younger and it was such a touchy subject for me that it would always set me off emotionally. I feel like I look a little chubby at the higher end of the weight range too, and it also makes me nervous about tipping back over into being overweight so I don't really like it.


Maybe it was a good thing they didn't work for you because your bigger breast might have been the only one responding to them after all. How did you manage to get over the ED? Were you IP or did you just 'get over it'? I feel like I won't ever be able to just eat something and not think about it. I'm not overly worried about losing weight having an impact on NBE since I actually want the bigger breast to shrink as it is twice the size of my smaller one which stays small no matter what. When I was underweight I thought I was never gonna be that overweight person again, to me that was an entirely different human being at the time. But here I am. I have become a slob since gaining all that weight because I feel hideous anyway, so why make an effort to look good.

People can be really rude, I got a lot of negative comments when I was severely underweight, as well. But I also hate hearing that I look "good" after having gained weight.. 
How is it going with the pumping? :-)

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#35

(22-07-2020, 10:22)koyasha Wrote:  

(21-07-2020, 14:58)PoisonIvy Wrote:  
(21-07-2020, 10:10)koyasha Wrote:  

I wonder why it's not as active anymore. I don't think there are fewer women who want to enhance their breasts naturally. Maybe everything has been discussed already, but I wouldn't mind discussing it all over again if it meant more activity!

Did you experience any side effects from the herbs you were using back then or did they simply not work?

I also stopped NBE at some point and gained weight lol. It was only one year or so for me, but I'm back to square one, as well. How much did you weigh before, now, and what is your goal weight? My highest weight was 169.8 lbs and my lowest was 68.6 lbs (a difference of more than 100 lbs, sounds insane to me). I did or so still have issues with food, though. I'm around 133 lbs now (at 5'1), which is borderline overweight :-( I'd like to lose 34 lbs. I have a small frame, so I look chubby when I am in the higher range of normal according to bmi standards. A former colleague of mine was calling me chubby behind my back after I had gained weight and was in the 103-110 lbs range, so it's not just in my head. Glad he did it behind my back, though, it was easier hearing from someone that 'someone else' had said that about me while the person who told me was being nice about it. It was a touchy subject for me.

I think I read somewhere that you too, had bulimia at some point? How is it going with the eating for you these days? 

"Go big or go home", I'm gonna make this my motto, I'm such a slob when it comes to a lot of things. I haven't been to the gym in 8 months.. I'm sitting here dreaming about losing weight and looking fitter and better in general while.. well, sitting here.

Maybe the stretch marks are a result of growth, but I doubt it, my boob doesn't look any different in shape yet. I know what you mean about examining your breast(s) in the mirror all the time. I wish I could avoid mirrors for a year and then wake up and be like wow :-)

I don't know either but I really miss how active it use to be here. I never went on any herbs that was too heavy like PM or anything. I think Saw Palmetto & Fenugreek and a few of the things like that. I don't remember side effects I just remember them not working, but I also don't think I stayed on them long at all.  I'm shorter as well. Yeah, I did a really long time ago but I have been recovered for several years. It was something that was when I was a teenager and possibly played a part in my breasts not really developing correctly. I'd like to lose 15 lbs. I'm not worried about it impacting NBE since I'm only going to be pumping my smaller breast until they are even (which will likely take longer than it will to lose the weight) and my small breast doesn't respond at all to weight gain or loss anyways. That is horrible about your colleague!!! I wish people weren't like that. I've had my fair share with people like that when I was younger and it was such a touchy subject for me that it would always set me off emotionally. I feel like I look a little chubby at the higher end of the weight range too, and it also makes me nervous about tipping back over into being overweight so I don't really like it.


Maybe it was a good thing they didn't work for you because your bigger breast might have been the only one responding to them after all. How did you manage to get over the ED? Were you IP or did you just 'get over it'? I feel like I won't ever be able to just eat something and not think about it. I'm not overly worried about losing weight having an impact on NBE since I actually want the bigger breast to shrink as it is twice the size of my smaller one which stays small no matter what. When I was underweight I thought I was never gonna be that overweight person again, to me that was an entirely different human being at the time. But here I am. I have become a slob since gaining all that weight because I feel hideous anyway, so why make an effort to look good.

People can be really rude, I got a lot of negative comments when I was severely underweight, as well. But I also hate hearing that I look "good" after having gained weight.. 
How is it going with the pumping? :-)

It wasn't an all at once thing. I had to work on a lot of the root causes which was a mixture of a chemical imbalance and childhood abuse, and it still took a long time. I did the IP thing when I was younger but it actually didn't work for me at the time but I also don't think I was ready. I have been recovered for several years now and I still have to be careful and watch myself whenever I'm going through something difficult to make sure I don't slip back into it despite being recovered for so long. I still think about food quite a bit and am always either on a diet or breaking a diet but in the sense of the average woman in this day and age and not in a disordered way if that makes sense. Girl same, on that part about the smaller breast staying the same no matter what. Aw, don't beat yourself up. I know it's hard because I use to be the same but I feel like it just makes it harder on yourself, ya know? Yes, whenever I'm my goal weight (which is a completely healthy weight w/ a bmi of 20-21) I get a lot of comments about how I look like a child. I'm short as well so the mixture of being short, thin, and not having breasts makes me look kinda child like when I'm smaller. Whenever I have been overweight in the past I got a lot of nasty comments then too. It's society that is the problem. I've noticed a lot of women deal with this problem where it doesn't matter what we weight because someone always has something negative to say. 
I picked up some Arnica yesterday to help w/ the discoloration. I've heard it mentioned on this thread and other threads. I was kinda worried about it because it says it reduces swelling and isn't that what I want? I'm at the point though that I feel like I need to just push through the discoloration instead of taking breaks for it to heal. I'm not actually overpumping. It doesn't hurt and it happens at the -1 gauge which is like nothing, so I think taking breaks doesn't force my body to get use to it. I could be wrong, but I'm hoping since I'm not actually overpumping that I can push through it and force my body to get use to it w/ the help of things like topicals. I'm the type of person who bruises very easily, so I'm not really surprised I'm dealing with this. A lot of people on here say that you need to get up to -5 gauge for growth and I can't even get to -2 without issues so I'm going to just keep going at the pressure I'm doing (which is -1) while using topicals and hopefully the discoloration goes away and I can crank it up slowly overtime. It might be a thing where the discoloration won't ever go away while I'm pumping because of how easily I bruise and I'll have to deal with it the whole time which I don't mind, I just don't want something that will be permanent even after I quit pumping which is my only concern. How is it going for you?
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#36

I almost forgot that I had to stop using the tape the other day because I keep breaking out in a rash from it. I tend to react like that to tape if I get blood drawn or anything too so I should have expected it. I'll have to come up with a new method as right now I'm not doing anything to it. I'm not overly concerned right now though because I do want it to proportionally catch up to it's big sister, but it will be a bigger deal to me as I get closer.

Anyways, I'm practically destroying the look of my skin at this point, but I'm still going to do my pushing through it experiment because the swelling is too good to pass up. It doesn't hurt or anything and I'm not even doing a lot gauge wise so I feel like my skin is just being annoying. I got 1/2 of an inch of swelling right after my first session today. 1/2 an inch when I'm only doing 1 breast and it's already so small so it looks noticeably different. It's obviously not growth as it was completely gone when I woke up and measured this morning and it's only been 1 1/2 ish weeks anyways so I'm not expecting growth, but I do feel like the swelling is a good sign that it should eventually turn into growth if I can keep it up for a long time.  I'm still trying to push through it since it doesn't hurt to try to get myself up to that magical -5 eventually. Lots of heat. And I'm putting on Arnica at night as of last night which I do think gets rid of more of my swelling overnight (but I could just be imagining it as swelling would probably disappear overnight regardless) but I also think the discoloration went away faster. So I guess I'll be the guinea pig for girls in the future who have this problem to see if the pushing through it (because I know I'm not actually overpumping and it doesn't hurt during or after and  my skin is just overreacting) w/ lots of extra TLC works to get them up to the gauge and swelling they need for growth. Either my pushing through it theory will work or my breast skin will look terrible.
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#37

(22-07-2020, 14:54)PoisonIvy Wrote:  [quote='koyasha' pid='208083' dateline='1595409734'] It wasn't an all at once thing. I had to work on a lot of the root causes which was a mixture of a chemical imbalance and childhood abuse, and it still took a long time. I did the IP thing when I was younger but it actually didn't work for me at the time but I also don't think I was ready. I have been recovered for several years now and I still have to be careful and watch myself whenever I'm going through something difficult to make sure I don't slip back into it despite being recovered for so long. I still think about food quite a bit and am always either on a diet or breaking a diet but in the sense of the average woman in this day and age and not in a disordered way if that makes sense. Girl same, on that part about the smaller breast staying the same no matter what. Aw, don't beat yourself up. I know it's hard because I use to be the same but I feel like it just makes it harder on yourself, ya know? Yes, whenever I'm my goal weight (which is a completely healthy weight w/ a bmi of 20-21) I get a lot of comments about how I look like a child. I'm short as well so the mixture of being short, thin, and not having breasts makes me look kinda child like when I'm smaller. Whenever I have been overweight in the past I got a lot of nasty comments then too. It's society that is the problem. I've noticed a lot of women deal with this problem where it doesn't matter what we weight because someone always has something negative to say. 
I picked up some Arnica yesterday to help w/ the discoloration. I've heard it mentioned on this thread and other threads. I was kinda worried about it because it says it reduces swelling and isn't that what I want? I'm at the point though that I feel like I need to just push through the discoloration instead of taking breaks for it to heal. I'm not actually overpumping. It doesn't hurt and it happens at the -1 gauge which is like nothing, so I think taking breaks doesn't force my body to get use to it. I could be wrong, but I'm hoping since I'm not actually overpumping that I can push through it and force my body to get use to it w/ the help of things like topicals. I'm the type of person who bruises very easily, so I'm not really surprised I'm dealing with this. A lot of people on here say that you need to get up to -5 gauge for growth and I can't even get to -2 without issues so I'm going to just keep going at the pressure I'm doing (which is -1) while using topicals and hopefully the discoloration goes away and I can crank it up slowly overtime. It might be a thing where the discoloration won't ever go away while I'm pumping because of how easily I bruise and I'll have to deal with it the whole time which I don't mind, I just don't want something that will be permanent even after I quit pumping which is my only concern. How is it going for you?


I am sorry to hear about the childhood abuse, I hope whoever did that to you is behind bars and that you can live a normal life today. Is it still affecting your relationships with men negatively even after therapy? It's ok if you don't want to talk about it, I hope you are ok <3

I also think that you have to want to get better and that if you're not ready to recover, you won't or at least it will be a lot harder for others to convince you to. I was IP for self-harm 5 1/2 months when I was 16 and there were several girls with an ED. The girls were around my age so their parents had brought them there, but you could tell the difference between those who picked their own meals right away because they had to eat anyway, so why not choose what they liked? and those who were totally against the whole idea of even attempting to enjoy food again and feeding themselves properly. That definitely made a difference. I am happy for you that you are recovered now. Are you making unhealthy food choices or are not very active which makes you end up at a weight you don't feel comfortable at? When I see the calorie recommendations for someone my gender, height and activity level, it makes me want to cry lol. It seems ridiculously low and all this time I was thinking maybe I had a slow metabolism when in fact I really seem to be overeating constantly. How do people eat three meals a day and snack in between?

Thank you! Sometimes I feel like I am my biggest enemy, life could be easier if I was being nice to myself at least, but it's really hard for me.

Just like you I've gotten comments about looking like a child, as well. After my initial weight gain and my face being a little puffy, the bus driver was actually surprised I was an adult (17+ when it comes to bus tickets) and I was 32 lol. I still get carded on the rare occasion now at 34 (with my face mask on at least, my mouth area probably gives me away). I like how much we have in common :-)

Sorry to hear you got nasty comments when having been overweight, as well. You're right, society is the problem. Unless someone brings up that they are unhappy about their weight or is talking about weight related health problems, I think people need to keep their mouth shut. And even then, there are ways to be nice about things, some people are just plain rude. Women usually try to be mean when saying something negative about another woman's body, men are mostly oblivious or looking at a woman in a sexualized way only (ugh).


Since swelling is only temporary anyway, I think using Arnica is not a bad idea. But I'm also thinking that maybe your breast needs the swelling to get used to being stretched when you are pumping. But I am not sure, you could try and see if the Arnica is helping with the discoloration and if it's not, you can always stop using it.

Since you say you bruise easily, yes, maybe this will always be your body's response to pumping, but it might get better with time if you keep doing it. I'd say as long as there are no real bruises showing up after pumping and your breasts don't turn purple, try to stick your schedule. If the discoloration doesn't go away after a week or two, maybe take a short break and see if it does, as long as it doesn't get worse, it should always go away again. Even if you just stop once to see if even after an extended period of daily pumping the discoloration will still disappear if you take a break. At least then you will know that it does and you can keep pumping without having to worry about this being permanent. 
I'm doing ok, I want to start doing chest exercises an hour before pumping because according to someone in another thread, this is a good idea because of increased blood flow in your breasts. I don't know why you should wait for an hour, though, but since I have to get my ass home from the gym anyway, this sounds good to me. First of all, I will have to get my ass TO the gym, though :-)

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#38

(22-07-2020, 19:37)koyasha Wrote:  

(22-07-2020, 14:54)PoisonIvy Wrote:  
(22-07-2020, 10:22)koyasha Wrote:   It wasn't an all at once thing. I had to work on a lot of the root causes which was a mixture of a chemical imbalance and childhood abuse, and it still took a long time. I did the IP thing when I was younger but it actually didn't work for me at the time but I also don't think I was ready. I have been recovered for several years now and I still have to be careful and watch myself whenever I'm going through something difficult to make sure I don't slip back into it despite being recovered for so long. I still think about food quite a bit and am always either on a diet or breaking a diet but in the sense of the average woman in this day and age and not in a disordered way if that makes sense. Girl same, on that part about the smaller breast staying the same no matter what. Aw, don't beat yourself up. I know it's hard because I use to be the same but I feel like it just makes it harder on yourself, ya know? Yes, whenever I'm my goal weight (which is a completely healthy weight w/ a bmi of 20-21) I get a lot of comments about how I look like a child. I'm short as well so the mixture of being short, thin, and not having breasts makes me look kinda child like when I'm smaller. Whenever I have been overweight in the past I got a lot of nasty comments then too. It's society that is the problem. I've noticed a lot of women deal with this problem where it doesn't matter what we weight because someone always has something negative to say. 
I picked up some Arnica yesterday to help w/ the discoloration. I've heard it mentioned on this thread and other threads. I was kinda worried about it because it says it reduces swelling and isn't that what I want? I'm at the point though that I feel like I need to just push through the discoloration instead of taking breaks for it to heal. I'm not actually overpumping. It doesn't hurt and it happens at the -1 gauge which is like nothing, so I think taking breaks doesn't force my body to get use to it. I could be wrong, but I'm hoping since I'm not actually overpumping that I can push through it and force my body to get use to it w/ the help of things like topicals. I'm the type of person who bruises very easily, so I'm not really surprised I'm dealing with this. A lot of people on here say that you need to get up to -5 gauge for growth and I can't even get to -2 without issues so I'm going to just keep going at the pressure I'm doing (which is -1) while using topicals and hopefully the discoloration goes away and I can crank it up slowly overtime. It might be a thing where the discoloration won't ever go away while I'm pumping because of how easily I bruise and I'll have to deal with it the whole time which I don't mind, I just don't want something that will be permanent even after I quit pumping which is my only concern. How is it going for you?


I am sorry to hear about the childhood abuse, I hope whoever did that to you is behind bars and that you can live a normal life today. Is it still affecting your relationships with men negatively even after therapy? It's ok if you don't want to talk about it, I hope you are ok <3

I also think that you have to want to get better and that if you're not ready to recover, you won't or at least it will be a lot harder for others to convince you to. I was IP for self-harm 5 1/2 months when I was 16 and there were several girls with an ED. The girls were around my age so their parents had brought them there, but you could tell the difference between those who picked their own meals right away because they had to eat anyway, so why not choose what they liked? and those who were totally against the whole idea of even attempting to enjoy food again and feeding themselves properly. That definitely made a difference. I am happy for you that you are recovered now. Are you making unhealthy food choices or are not very active which makes you end up at a weight you don't feel comfortable at? When I see the calorie recommendations for someone my gender, height and activity level, it makes me want to cry lol. It seems ridiculously low and all this time I was thinking maybe I had a slow metabolism when in fact I really seem to be overeating constantly. How do people eat three meals a day and snack in between?

Thank you! Sometimes I feel like I am my biggest enemy, life could be easier if I was being nice to myself at least, but it's really hard for me.

Just like you I've gotten comments about looking like a child, as well. After my initial weight gain and my face being a little puffy, the bus driver was actually surprised I was an adult (17+ when it comes to bus tickets) and I was 32 lol. I still get carded on the rare occasion now at 34 (with my face mask on at least, my mouth area probably gives me away). I like how much we have in common :-)

Sorry to hear you got nasty comments when having been overweight, as well. You're right, society is the problem. Unless someone brings up that they are unhappy about their weight or is talking about weight related health problems, I think people need to keep their mouth shut. And even then, there are ways to be nice about things, some people are just plain rude. Women usually try to be mean when saying something negative about another woman's body, men are mostly oblivious or looking at a woman in a sexualized way only (ugh).


Since swelling is only temporary anyway, I think using Arnica is not a bad idea. But I'm also thinking that maybe your breast needs the swelling to get used to being stretched when you are pumping. But I am not sure, you could try and see if the Arnica is helping with the discoloration and if it's not, you can always stop using it.

Since you say you bruise easily, yes, maybe this will always be your body's response to pumping, but it might get better with time if you keep doing it. I'd say as long as there are no real bruises showing up after pumping and your breasts don't turn purple, try to stick your schedule. If the discoloration doesn't go away after a week or two, maybe take a short break and see if it does, as long as it doesn't get worse, it should always go away again. Even if you just stop once to see if even after an extended period of daily pumping the discoloration will still disappear if you take a break. At least then you will know that it does and you can keep pumping without having to worry about this being permanent. 
I'm doing ok, I want to start doing chest exercises an hour before pumping because according to someone in another thread, this is a good idea because of increased blood flow in your breasts. I don't know why you should wait for an hour, though, but since I have to get my ass home from the gym anyway, this sounds good to me. First of all, I will have to get my ass TO the gym, though :-)

Well, for the last several years that I have been recovered I seem to diet at a normal calorie deficit  for a few months or several weeks and then fall off the wagon and eat junkfood and gain weight but when I fall of the wagon I tend to stay off for a good few weeks and sometimes a month. Wash/rinse/repeat over and over pretty much. It kind of just has me in a cycle where I just keep losing and gaining the same 10-15 pounds over and over because of it. I wish my skin looked young. My face def looks my age if not more (I'm in my late 20's), but I tend to have a childlike body at my goal weight. So if you can't see my face I look like I'm 13 and then suddenly you see my face and realize that nope I'm def not lol. We do have a lot in common Smile 
I've been thinking of trying the exercise thing before pumping too. Even if it's only for 5-10 minutes it feels like it couldn't hurt. Yes, I think that's pretty much what I'm going to do is to just keep pumping while using arnica and see what direction the discoloration goes over the next few weeks. See if it keeps getting worse and worse or if it gets worse at first and then gets better. If it doesn't get better after a few weeks though I'll take a short break just to make sure I don't make it permanent. I'm really hoping this works though and my skin just adjusts. Even if my skin had to look like that for the duration of the time I pump trying to get to my goal size I wouldn't mind as long as it's not permanent and it goes away when I stop.
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#39

I decided to take today off (but only today) because I didn't like how bad it looked and didn't want it to continue to get worse. It's okay though because I don't know why it took me until today to realize that overpumping is essentially a hickey. Trying the things on the site wasn't helping quick enough so I looked up ways to get rid of hickeys quickly and am spending the day giving my breast lots of TLC and trying out different methods to get rid of hickeys and so far so good. I'm hoping it's almost gone or gone by tomorrow. It will be nice if I can come up with a nice routine for getting rid of it though. I'm trying some stuff that isn't on the site and getting good results so I think when this trial and error is done I will create a thread with a guide to getting rid of overpump marks quickly.
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#40

(23-07-2020, 00:04)PoisonIvy Wrote:  
(22-07-2020, 19:37)koyasha Wrote:  

(22-07-2020, 14:54)PoisonIvy Wrote:  
(22-07-2020, 10:22)koyasha Wrote:   It wasn't an all at once thing. I had to work on a lot of the root causes which was a mixture of a chemical imbalance and childhood abuse, and it still took a long time. I did the IP thing when I was younger but it actually didn't work for me at the time but I also don't think I was ready. I have been recovered for several years now and I still have to be careful and watch myself whenever I'm going through something difficult to make sure I don't slip back into it despite being recovered for so long. I still think about food quite a bit and am always either on a diet or breaking a diet but in the sense of the average woman in this day and age and not in a disordered way if that makes sense. Girl same, on that part about the smaller breast staying the same no matter what. Aw, don't beat yourself up. I know it's hard because I use to be the same but I feel like it just makes it harder on yourself, ya know? Yes, whenever I'm my goal weight (which is a completely healthy weight w/ a bmi of 20-21) I get a lot of comments about how I look like a child. I'm short as well so the mixture of being short, thin, and not having breasts makes me look kinda child like when I'm smaller. Whenever I have been overweight in the past I got a lot of nasty comments then too. It's society that is the problem. I've noticed a lot of women deal with this problem where it doesn't matter what we weight because someone always has something negative to say. 
I picked up some Arnica yesterday to help w/ the discoloration. I've heard it mentioned on this thread and other threads. I was kinda worried about it because it says it reduces swelling and isn't that what I want? I'm at the point though that I feel like I need to just push through the discoloration instead of taking breaks for it to heal. I'm not actually overpumping. It doesn't hurt and it happens at the -1 gauge which is like nothing, so I think taking breaks doesn't force my body to get use to it. I could be wrong, but I'm hoping since I'm not actually overpumping that I can push through it and force my body to get use to it w/ the help of things like topicals. I'm the type of person who bruises very easily, so I'm not really surprised I'm dealing with this. A lot of people on here say that you need to get up to -5 gauge for growth and I can't even get to -2 without issues so I'm going to just keep going at the pressure I'm doing (which is -1) while using topicals and hopefully the discoloration goes away and I can crank it up slowly overtime. It might be a thing where the discoloration won't ever go away while I'm pumping because of how easily I bruise and I'll have to deal with it the whole time which I don't mind, I just don't want something that will be permanent even after I quit pumping which is my only concern. How is it going for you?


I am sorry to hear about the childhood abuse, I hope whoever did that to you is behind bars and that you can live a normal life today. Is it still affecting your relationships with men negatively even after therapy? It's ok if you don't want to talk about it, I hope you are ok <3

I also think that you have to want to get better and that if you're not ready to recover, you won't or at least it will be a lot harder for others to convince you to. I was IP for self-harm 5 1/2 months when I was 16 and there were several girls with an ED. The girls were around my age so their parents had brought them there, but you could tell the difference between those who picked their own meals right away because they had to eat anyway, so why not choose what they liked? and those who were totally against the whole idea of even attempting to enjoy food again and feeding themselves properly. That definitely made a difference. I am happy for you that you are recovered now. Are you making unhealthy food choices or are not very active which makes you end up at a weight you don't feel comfortable at? When I see the calorie recommendations for someone my gender, height and activity level, it makes me want to cry lol. It seems ridiculously low and all this time I was thinking maybe I had a slow metabolism when in fact I really seem to be overeating constantly. How do people eat three meals a day and snack in between?

Thank you! Sometimes I feel like I am my biggest enemy, life could be easier if I was being nice to myself at least, but it's really hard for me.

Just like you I've gotten comments about looking like a child, as well. After my initial weight gain and my face being a little puffy, the bus driver was actually surprised I was an adult (17+ when it comes to bus tickets) and I was 32 lol. I still get carded on the rare occasion now at 34 (with my face mask on at least, my mouth area probably gives me away). I like how much we have in common :-)

Sorry to hear you got nasty comments when having been overweight, as well. You're right, society is the problem. Unless someone brings up that they are unhappy about their weight or is talking about weight related health problems, I think people need to keep their mouth shut. And even then, there are ways to be nice about things, some people are just plain rude. Women usually try to be mean when saying something negative about another woman's body, men are mostly oblivious or looking at a woman in a sexualized way only (ugh).


Since swelling is only temporary anyway, I think using Arnica is not a bad idea. But I'm also thinking that maybe your breast needs the swelling to get used to being stretched when you are pumping. But I am not sure, you could try and see if the Arnica is helping with the discoloration and if it's not, you can always stop using it.

Since you say you bruise easily, yes, maybe this will always be your body's response to pumping, but it might get better with time if you keep doing it. I'd say as long as there are no real bruises showing up after pumping and your breasts don't turn purple, try to stick your schedule. If the discoloration doesn't go away after a week or two, maybe take a short break and see if it does, as long as it doesn't get worse, it should always go away again. Even if you just stop once to see if even after an extended period of daily pumping the discoloration will still disappear if you take a break. At least then you will know that it does and you can keep pumping without having to worry about this being permanent. 
I'm doing ok, I want to start doing chest exercises an hour before pumping because according to someone in another thread, this is a good idea because of increased blood flow in your breasts. I don't know why you should wait for an hour, though, but since I have to get my ass home from the gym anyway, this sounds good to me. First of all, I will have to get my ass TO the gym, though :-)

Well, for the last several years that I have been recovered I seem to diet at a normal calorie deficit  for a few months or several weeks and then fall off the wagon and eat junkfood and gain weight but when I fall of the wagon I tend to stay off for a good few weeks and sometimes a month. Wash/rinse/repeat over and over pretty much. It kind of just has me in a cycle where I just keep losing and gaining the same 10-15 pounds over and over because of it. I wish my skin looked young. My face def looks my age if not more (I'm in my late 20's), but I tend to have a childlike body at my goal weight. So if you can't see my face I look like I'm 13 and then suddenly you see my face and realize that nope I'm def not lol. We do have a lot in common Smile" alt="Smile" title="Smile"> 
I've been thinking of trying the exercise thing before pumping too. Even if it's only for 5-10 minutes it feels like it couldn't hurt. Yes, I think that's pretty much what I'm going to do is to just keep pumping while using arnica and see what direction the discoloration goes over the next few weeks. See if it keeps getting worse and worse or if it gets worse at first and then gets better. If it doesn't get better after a few weeks though I'll take a short break just to make sure I don't make it permanent. I'm really hoping this works though and my skin just adjusts. Even if my skin had to look like that for the duration of the time I pump trying to get to my goal size I wouldn't mind as long as it's not permanent and it goes away when I stop.


I am similar in that I fall off the wagon for an extended period of time, as well. It's that all-or-nothing mentality that comes into play for me here, I either do ok or I don't and when I don't, it's like it doesn't matter now since I messed up already anyway. But I do keep making plans to eat better/exercise more starting tomorrow/Monday/the 1st of the new month. Thanks to losing and gaining the same pounds over and over again the skin on my body doesn't look as young as the skin in my face. I have quite a bit of cellulite, too. Do you lead an active lifestyle? Part of me likes having a childlike body, do you? And while I do want to improve the appearance of my breasts, I'm not one of those girls (I should call myself a woman at my age haha) that wants to have huge breasts. They'd look out of proportion on me :-)
10-15 minutes of exercise is better than no exercise, so I'd say go for it!!  

A hickey! Thinking about it, it makes sense. It's ok to take a day off, a lot of people recommend that.

Are you still using the Arnica or is that completely useless in this case?

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