athena23
12-08-2014, 06:01 PM
This is my first post. I am a 52 year old crossdresser that has been out to my wife for over 8 years. We have teenage children and my dressing is limited to our bedroom or maybe around the house when everyone is not home. For a few years I was working from home and was able to dress for a limited time after everyone left the house. For me it is more erotically charged than a feeling I want to be a woman. Its the thrill of the dressing that gets me off.
I have underdressed with panties and a soft bra but that was limited to winter. My wife is very supportive and has bought me most of clothes (thrift shop finds) and a couple times a month I dress for/with her and we have sex of one form or another.
For about the same time I have been out to my wife, I have had terrible problems related to a vasectomy gone bad. I am the one in a million cases and had severe/debilitating scrotal pain. After 5 years of suffering, tests, antibiotics, pain medication, I had an epididymectomy which also went bad and I eventually had the problem testicle removed. After I recovered from the surgery, I had about 6 months of being relatively pain-free till similar problems started up in my remaining/healthy testicle. After suffering intense pain for another 5 months I had a vasectomy reversal and have been relatively pain free since. I have been taking saw palmetto and other prostate supplements for about 5 years to deal with prostatitis and frequency issues and have found it to be helpful. Over the past few months, I noticed that my chest has started to sort of develop breasts. In fact I feel a jiggle when I walk now. I am quite fit for my age and pretty slim but have underneath my soft breast (or fat) layer I have strong pectoral muscles. I attribute the development to lower testosterone from only one testicle, medication, my age and the fact I have been shaping my chest by wearing bras etc. I have used hard forms up to this point.
I have no plans to transition or to live as femme. I have a full beard and am happy being a man, but I find the feeling of small breasts to be exciting. I sort of figure that I deserve to be happy and if having small breasts makes me happy, then why not. My wife was recently away for a trip with our son I started to research male breast development and did some massages and even bought Fenugreek but am hesitant to take it.
My wife came home today and I told her that I think I am developing breasts. I think I am 38B but she think I'm more like an A cup. She asked my if i planned to develop breasts or wanted to transition. I told her the truth that I don't want to live as a woman, but find the breast development exciting. I told her that I must have some level of gender dysphoria but I'm not really sure where it will take me. She said that if I didn't plan to develop breasts but have some now that I should enjoy them and not feel bad about it. I still want to do the massage because I like how it feels but want to be careful not to grow too much. Can I just be a male with small breasts? Does it matter? How much is too much? I'm excited but conflicted.
I have attached a couple of photos. Are these moobs, boobs or fat?
[attachment=7738][attachment=7739]
I have underdressed with panties and a soft bra but that was limited to winter. My wife is very supportive and has bought me most of clothes (thrift shop finds) and a couple times a month I dress for/with her and we have sex of one form or another.
For about the same time I have been out to my wife, I have had terrible problems related to a vasectomy gone bad. I am the one in a million cases and had severe/debilitating scrotal pain. After 5 years of suffering, tests, antibiotics, pain medication, I had an epididymectomy which also went bad and I eventually had the problem testicle removed. After I recovered from the surgery, I had about 6 months of being relatively pain-free till similar problems started up in my remaining/healthy testicle. After suffering intense pain for another 5 months I had a vasectomy reversal and have been relatively pain free since. I have been taking saw palmetto and other prostate supplements for about 5 years to deal with prostatitis and frequency issues and have found it to be helpful. Over the past few months, I noticed that my chest has started to sort of develop breasts. In fact I feel a jiggle when I walk now. I am quite fit for my age and pretty slim but have underneath my soft breast (or fat) layer I have strong pectoral muscles. I attribute the development to lower testosterone from only one testicle, medication, my age and the fact I have been shaping my chest by wearing bras etc. I have used hard forms up to this point.
I have no plans to transition or to live as femme. I have a full beard and am happy being a man, but I find the feeling of small breasts to be exciting. I sort of figure that I deserve to be happy and if having small breasts makes me happy, then why not. My wife was recently away for a trip with our son I started to research male breast development and did some massages and even bought Fenugreek but am hesitant to take it.
My wife came home today and I told her that I think I am developing breasts. I think I am 38B but she think I'm more like an A cup. She asked my if i planned to develop breasts or wanted to transition. I told her the truth that I don't want to live as a woman, but find the breast development exciting. I told her that I must have some level of gender dysphoria but I'm not really sure where it will take me. She said that if I didn't plan to develop breasts but have some now that I should enjoy them and not feel bad about it. I still want to do the massage because I like how it feels but want to be careful not to grow too much. Can I just be a male with small breasts? Does it matter? How much is too much? I'm excited but conflicted.
I have attached a couple of photos. Are these moobs, boobs or fat?
[attachment=7738][attachment=7739]