I hope that I am not discriminated against for being male on this forum. I was immediately banned on another forum for a similar post seeking advice from anyone about how to manage breast obsession. I have found many threads on Google posted over the years, originated by men and women on this topic, frequently by women who themselves suffer from the same obsession, and the overwhelming majority of responses appear to rationalize and even justify it. I found a breastnexus thread that was the most realistic collection of well-thought-out responses (although with a super creepy one too!), and it lead me to believe that fielding my inquiry here would be appropriate. Please, please do not ban me! I am at my wits end here and becoming extremely depressed over it.
Here is the reference:
http://www.breastnexus.com/showthread.php?tid=12208
I think that I have a serious problem and would like to know if anyone has had success with therapy or behavioral conditioning to reduce or manage a severe preoccupation with huge breasts. My personal plight developed strongly as a very young child due to a discovery of hardcore pornography magazines around age four and a collection of hardcore videos around age eight. I am 34 now, and my obsession is frequently crippling. The amount of available and free pornography exploiting this obsession has increased by orders of magnitude consistently over the last decade. My past relationships have imploded because of it, and I am starting to sense that a full-blown fetish is taking root that will leave me unable to engage or function in traditional sex.
I am so frequently browsing and accumulating pornography related to breast worship/fetishism that it is impossible to hide it, and my girlfriends inevitably find it and feel extremely insecure and unattractive. This is reinforced by an accelerated decline in my desire to initiate or participate in sex with them. The process usually involves me being very attracted to them initially, even with sub-A cup breasts, and even falling deeply in love, and I believe for a time that love has conquered the issue once and for all. Once the brain-chemical "in love" phase passes I return to my bad pornography habits, I convince myself that I won't be happy with small or average breasts, and the cycle continues. What follows is a drawn out and gruesome breakup because we care about each other deeply and are frequently best friends within an otherwise loving and constructive relationship. I am positive that this would continue to happen even if my partner's breasts were gigantic because the problem stems from an objectification of breasts themselves, and I couldn't possibly bring myself to radically objectify someone I respected and loved like that, and I am worried that I am not capable of compartmentalizing or balancing my interaction with a partner in vs outside of the bedroom, for instance. It goes far beyond just sexual interaction, and my voracious consumption of visual stimulation and fantasy can not be focused on one object consistently, either way.
This cannot be healthy for me! I respect that for many people it is more of a natural and essentially harmless preoccupation, but surely I am perpetuating it to a fault. Any advice regarding professional help or anecdotal experiences with reigning this in would be extremely appreciated! I appreciate those that would like to be comforting, but I need tough love and real talk here.
Thank you!
There's a lot of us males here so you wont worry about being vanned due to that ..... alone! lol... Welcome to the forum! and if you love breasts so. ugh maybe you should seriously consider growing your own.... that's what I did....
(24-04-2014, 12:50 AM)boobguy Wrote: [ -> ]I hope that I am not discriminated against for being male on this forum. I was immediately banned on another forum for a similar post seeking advice from anyone about how to manage breast obsession. I have found many threads on Google posted over the years, originated by men and women on this topic, frequently by women who themselves suffer from the same obsession, and the overwhelming majority of responses appear to rationalize and even justify it. I found a breastnexus thread that was the most realistic collection of well-thought-out responses (although with a super creepy one too!), and it lead me to believe that fielding my inquiry here would be appropriate. Please, please do not ban me! I am at my wits end here and becoming extremely depressed over it.
Here is the reference:
http://www.breastnexus.com/showthread.php?tid=12208
I think that I have a serious problem and would like to know if anyone has had success with therapy or behavioral conditioning to reduce or manage a severe preoccupation with huge breasts. My personal plight developed strongly as a very young child due to a discovery of hardcore pornography magazines around age four and a collection of hardcore videos around age eight. I am 34 now, and my obsession is frequently crippling. The amount of available and free pornography exploiting this obsession has increased by orders of magnitude consistently over the last decade. My past relationships have imploded because of it, and I am starting to sense that a full-blown fetish is taking root that will leave me unable to engage or function in traditional sex.
I am so frequently browsing and accumulating pornography related to breast worship/fetishism that it is impossible to hide it, and my girlfriends inevitably find it and feel extremely insecure and unattractive. This is reinforced by an accelerated decline in my desire to initiate or participate in sex with them. The process usually involves me being very attracted to them initially, even with sub-A cup breasts, and even falling deeply in love, and I believe for a time that love has conquered the issue once and for all. Once the brain-chemical "in love" phase passes I return to my bad pornography habits, I convince myself that I won't be happy with small or average breasts, and the cycle continues. What follows is a drawn out and gruesome breakup because we care about each other deeply and are frequently best friends within an otherwise loving and constructive relationship. I am positive that this would continue to happen even if my partner's breasts were gigantic because the problem stems from an objectification of breasts themselves, and I couldn't possibly bring myself to radically objectify someone I respected and loved like that, and I am worried that I am not capable of compartmentalizing or balancing my interaction with a partner in vs outside of the bedroom, for instance. It goes far beyond just sexual interaction, and my voracious consumption of visual stimulation and fantasy can not be focused on one object consistently, either way.
This cannot be healthy for me! I respect that for many people it is more of a natural and essentially harmless preoccupation, but surely I am perpetuating it to a fault. Any advice regarding professional help or anecdotal experiences with reigning this in would be extremely appreciated! I appreciate those that would like to be comforting, but I need tough love and real talk here.
Thank you!
All I would like to say (as a woman) is that many people have fetishes. Some are shocking, some are tame. If you feel that this Fetish is wrecking havoc on your life, I would encourage you to speak to a professional who can give you advice and coping techniques. There is nothing wrong with talking to someone, your mental health is very important.
I would also like to say as a woman, that do not feel ashamed or afraid of your fetish. You can't help what you like, and a fetish is just that- something out of your control that is an immense turn on or obsession. It's no different from people who have a foot fetish, or those who prefer obese women.
Please don't beat yourself up over it. Admitting you do have a problem that is inhibiting your quality of life is a very hard thing to do, and you have done it.
You just need to decide where to go from here.
-bette
First, accept yourself. You DO objectify women, but everyone does. Seriously. People (women and men equally) look at women like they were looking to a table full of food and look at men like they were looking to a door. We perceive women's bodies as "an ass, boobs, some hair, a pair of legs, lips, and eyes" and we perceive the male body as a whole person, only 1 thing, and not a bunch of objects.
That's why you don't see a lot of arm-obsessed women out there, (neither female porn focused on arms
) women are much more likely to be obsessed with breasts.
Second, you need to know why you are obsessed with breasts. Well, let me tell a weird, but real story. Long time ago, men took women only from behind, like animals. So he could see her butt and labia, and get excited. Then people started doing face-to-face sex, and there were evolutionary advantages to it. And since the man couldn't see the women's ass and labia, he mated with women who had mimics of those body parts in the front of her body. Big breasts are self-mimicry of the ass, and red full lips in the face are self-mimicry of the lips down there. And that's ALL big breast are for. Flat chested woman can nurse just as good as any other woman. Actually the only thing that differentiates an A cup from a F cup is the amount of fat in the breasts.
So you don't love breasts because they are breasts, but because subconsciously you think you're seeing a butt.
So why not divide your self-mimicry obsession with the real thing. If you know what I mean.
And anyway in some years this obsession will start fading, since a you age your body produces less testosterone.
First off, I was going to say almost the same thing as Karren; although I wouldn't suggest GROWING your own right off the bat. Depending on how much money you have to spend on it, at least try to find a nice large pair of silicone bra inserts, get yourself a bra to fit them and you and put them on at home for a while and see if that doesn't help. If that satisfies you, either just stick with those or, if that's not enough, but you like the look/feel of them and want them 24/7, THEN grow your own.
I've always been into them, too!! I have a HUGE collection of pictures saved on various hard drives because I love the look of them, but, I hardly EVER go through those literally THOUSANDS of pictures just to look at the beautiful tits I've got pictures of. These days, I still collect them, but find myself wondering why, if I might never bother to look at them again! Also, these days, I've become so jaded (self-jaded?) by the sight of them, a group of women could walk down the street topless in front of me and, after the initial pleasure of seeing this, it probably wouldn't phase me a bit! "Oh! Look! Women walking topless down the street!! Cool!! Pretty damn nice!! Well, I have to get back to this recording project." In fact, there's a scene from, "Surf II", where Eric Stoltz and a fellow surfer are in a beach bungalow with two pretty girls and the guys are talking non-stop surf stories!! Finally, the girls get fed up with the guys ignoring them, so they take off their bikini tops and call to the guys. They stop talking, look at the girls and go, "Hey! You guys are naked!! Cool! So, anyway, like I said, I'm in this HUGE pipeline and I'm TOTALLY SURROUNDED with water and I'm REALLY stoked...". That's pretty much what it'd be like. MAYBE you're getting to that point, soon, too.
In a way, I have the same obsession, just not as heavily as you do. I suppose I just rationalized it enough to reign myself in where that's concerned.
My only other suggestion would be, see a shrink.
As for the other comment, the reason guys are attracted to tits is because we used to walk around on all fours and ass was in our face, and THAT it what attracted men to women. One day, we learned to walk erect and the ass we loved so much was no longer in our face anymore, so, nature created an ass for us in the form of tits.
MM
(24-04-2014, 02:04 AM)Missed Miss Wrote: [ -> ]As for the other comment, the reason guys are attracted to tits is because we used to walk around on all fours and ass was in our face, and THAT it what attracted men to women. One day, we learned to walk erect and the ass we loved so much was no longer in our face anymore, so, nature created an ass for us in the form of tits.
MM
This is so funny isn't it, the idea of an ass in our chest. Lol
And yeah men like breats because of this too but also because of what I said.
And there are even more reasons. Breasts are what our moms gave us milk with, how not to love them? Also women with natural big breasts and a slim waist have more estrogen and are more fertile.
It's
no wonder you and the OP and so much boys out there are obsessed with them.
(24-04-2014, 02:39 AM)Wtf am I doing here Wrote: [ -> ] (24-04-2014, 02:04 AM)Missed Miss Wrote: [ -> ]As for the other comment, the reason guys are attracted to tits is because we used to walk around on all fours and ass was in our face, and THAT it what attracted men to women. One day, we learned to walk erect and the ass we loved so much was no longer in our face anymore, so, nature created an ass for us in the form of tits.
MM
This is so funny isn't it, the idea of an ass in our chest. Lol
And yeah men like breats because of this too but also because of what I said.
And there are even more reasons. Breasts are what our moms gave us milk with, how not to love them? Also women with natural big breasts and a slim waist have more estrogen and are more fertile.
It's no wonder you and the OP and so much boys out there are obsessed with them.
I'm obsessed, but not as much as the OP. Can you blame me? They're SOOOO beautiful!!!!
If you are concerned, and you obviously are, find a therapist with whom you can speak openly and safely, and then see where the conversation takes you.
I personally think that your real problem is with porn and not with breasts per se. Porn exploits our bio-chemistry, especial us males, intentionally objectifying and depersonalizing sex, and the result is frequently dependence, declining sensitivity, and erectile dysfunction. These, in turn, play hell with relationships, self esteem, and confidence.
Get professional help and get control of your life back.
Yarrr!
Thank you for the replies everyone. I have actually purchased various huge breast forms and toys to play with and touch to see if that helped to express desire and get it out of my system, so to speak, but it has made it much worse and I feel super creepy for having them now. I don't foresee any realistic way to pursue and date women with huge fake breasts and have been more an more tempted to visit prostitutes as an alternative. I know this is not going to help at all!
Porn is absolutely the root of the problem and I can't imagine life without it. I lived in a remote, rural part of New Zealand for a year once with no access to high speed internet, and as months passed without porn I became ravenous for it and would binge any time I was able to get access to it. It's worse than any drug I have ever taken, and I've done a lot of recreational drugs of all sorts without ever becoming obsessively addicted! I seriously feel like an analogue to a tragic alcoholic that only gets worse.